What happens in Belize stays in Belize...

So, being busy and on the move no good opportunity presented itself to make separate posts about anything. Since the last blog Ive been to Tikal in Guatemala, then traveled to Caye Caulker, Belize. Right now off again to inland Belize for some jungle exploration.


(Picture: Misty sunrise with howler monkeys as background music)

Tikal is a huge ruin site close to Flores in Guatemala. Its the biggest and most excavated site in Guatemala, hence also the most popular. With a population of 125 000+ in its prime, and with an impressive military history to boast of, this made for an interesting tour. The drawback was that our guide didnt know that much about Tikals history. No matter, he was an entertaining guide, and Id been reading up in advance (good boy). We arrived at the site 0400 in the morning to catch sunrise from the highest pyramid.

(Picture: The sun revealing other pyramids not visible in the dark)

The day after Tikal we went straight to Caye Caulker, Belize (leaving behind a fucked up, but increadibly interesting country. A small caye (coral island) with some of the worlds nicest reefs. The first day we went snorkling among loads of sting rays, lobsters and sharks on the reefs. The whole trip was ended by a smooth BBQ made up by the catch of the day. Caye Caulker in itself was expensive, but good fun. Days spent lazying around on the white beaches and grilling. Met some british people who Ive followed inland to San Inglesio. Beautiful men, all of them. They love a bit of sun tan lotion... Planing to visit these guys sometime this year, maybe even fitting the Bloomsday into the visit. Because of Caye Caulkers lazy nature, the only thing I can write about the actual happenings there are some quotes:

"Its hot, its hot, Im fucking hot, its hot, Im fucking hot..."
- Local guy walking down the street talking to himself

"You are everything to me"
"What happens in Belize, stays in Belize"
- Brave, gay men making a go for Christian. Note that being gay is illegal in Belize...

"India, aint that where the Nile is?"
- Carl B, caught at intellectual peak.

The plan from now on is to enjoy San Inglesios different pleasures. After that, me and one of the british "chaps" will head for Mexico and then Cuba. My stay in Belize (and Cuba) have, fortunantly for you, shortened my stay and Ill have to return earlier. In fact, I found 17 of May a good date for my arrival in Norway. This will be a day with powerful symbolism, reinforced by the fact that the constitution was signed on this date back in good, old 1814.

Sorry for not uploading any pictures from Caye Caulker, but since my camera is broke I cant do much about this. Maybe later if I get hold of Christians pictures.

Anders H

El Mirador

Yes, it is indeed true!

From now on, this blog will be written in english. This because of the regretful fact that we have people in this world who lack the ability to speak Norwegian.


(Picture: from right to left; Marcos, Christian and Anders)

I just came back from my long awaited trip to El Mirador. Because Cotopaxi was coy and bashful and hid herself in a horrible snow storm, I was very eager to go trough with this little adventure! A relatively random encounter involving rum, good chicken and a game of dice introduced me to two swiss gentlemen; Marcos and Christian. They already had a trip planned for next Monday. I asked if I could join, and it was a deal.

We arrive early Monday morning in the small pueblo Carmelita. We were still a bit drunk (Los Amigos is true enough hot, but it cant be called dry...), Marcos had a bad foot and my camera broke due to a speed bump (!?). Here we met our guides, Alexander and Ronaldo. I must say, a lovely couple indeed. Alexander was our main guide. A soft soul when it came to "senor Jesus" and nature, he also coined the expression "una chica con mucho leche" and had a steady hand when it came to cooking.
The last day of our return, Ronaldo actually rode one of the free horses in advance to buy cold beer for us on our return, something which was saluted by all the other weary wanderers. This, besides from him being a really nice guy, was topped by the fact that he managed to fish 14 carps (karpefisk) in the utterly dry and warm jungle of El Mirador.
(Picture: Marcos demonstrating old rituals of the sun, and Venus; the "star" of love...)

The journey in itself was about 130 km in total, if you dont include the guided tour round El Mirador. What can I say? Six days with constant heat, wild animals and no shower. At night we camped at different ruin spots, so the evenings were spent on top of some pyramid resting our sore feet, talking shit and sipping some whiskey during a sunset or a clear sky filled with stars. It could have been homo erotic, but we all smelled like ancient sanitarian facilities so that was a no-go.
(Picture: Sunset from Tintal)

We slept straight on the ground (my back still has traumas from certain rocks...) with a cotton sheet and a mosquito net (we were well equipped, but for some reason we didnt bring anything to sleep on).

When we arrived at El Mirador it was hard to imagine how it had been here when the Mayas were around. The area which we had walked in was filled with uncovered ruins from different long forgotten towns. The two biggest were El Mirador and Nakbe, with respectively 250 and 125 thousand inhabitants in their prime. These cities were located not much more then three hours from each other, and the surrounding area must have been covered with farmland as far as the eye could see.

While camping and exploring El Mirador, Ronaldo went out fishing in a small mud pound some hundred meters from the camp. He came back with the 14 infamous carps. These were gutted and put straight in a "fish soup". It was an interesting meal, although the carps undeniably tasted of mud.
(Picture: Ronaldo proudly showing me his catch)


(Picture: Alex worked his magic on the fish)

The guided tours in the jungle/city of El Mirador were fascinating. Endless walls overgrown by jungle, and temples wherever you went. The whole experience were topped when the guide told about the thousands of tombs still uncovered beneath our feet. Saw some of the human sacrificial alters and the warrior temple as well. This temple had a strangely comical feel because of a cocky carving on the front portraying a jaguars paw clutching the symbol of Tikal (the most well known of the mayan ruins in Guatemala. More or less uncovered and overcrowded with tourists. Tikal was the center of the most powerful (military wise) Mayan civilization). This was from pre classic period, when El Mirador was the "owner"/"ruler" of the lesser Tikal. Later on, in a showdown between "Señor Serpiento" (El Mirador) and "Lord Chocolate" (Tikal), El Mirador was humiliated when they lost against the smaller Tikal army. The number of alters/prisons made for human sacrefices might suggest that this was a costly loss to the "Miradorians"...

Anyway, what was more cheerful then war and sacrefice, was our success in corruption. Just before our departure from El Mirador, Marco went up to the local guard and gave him a bottle of relatively good rum. To this he replied only; "Vamos a mirar el tunel". El tunel was the cellar of the warrior temple, and wasnt fully excavated. Therefor the archaeologists had locked it up.


(Picture: You can get anywhere with a collgate smile and a bottle of rum)

This was maybe even more fascinating, climbing among spiders and scorpions in small tunnels. Watching statues and "paintings" made by the Mayans.

After this we returned home trough Nakbe, the oldest of the two towns and the origin of El Mirador. Maybe not as impressive, but it still was interesting to see the classic ballgame arena, with its mandatory sacrificial alter (where the winners, losers or both teams were sacrificed. Although, sometimes modesty prevailed and only the captain of the team was killed).

We returned with style, stinking like loose dogs and sweating like burger flippers.

After some reading I think I have decided to head for Belize now. Sailing among the reefs there and enjoying the creole language. After all the quotes Ive heard from this place, and with its shabby pirate history would make for a perfect stop on my travels.

Just some random quotes to show you why I like creole:

"Com awee, com awee
I not tryin to devour you
com awee, com awee
I jos tryin to deflower you..."
- Belize local Reggae

"Elekshaan!! I still living like a sparrow maan..."
- Local expressing his disgust
for democracy when asked by tourist

Conversation between backpacker and bartender:
- "Local or imported?"
- "Ill try the local"
- "Yer a brave man"

"An tell him no man can take another man wit him to heaven - you got to recognize Jesus Christ as your personal Savior, an live yer life for him. No one do it for you!"
- Friar clearing up some theology for a local

"HAVE CITIZEN PRIDE AND THROW DIRT IN DIRT BOX"
- Sign on street

To top it all, in Belize they have a lizard that can walk on water, hence they named it "Jesus Chrizt".
Yes, with a z.

More pictures might come later, but right now Im having some trouble with them.

Hasta Luego
Anders H

San Pedro

I morgen forlater jeg San Pedro og tar bussen mot Flores. I flores skal jeg sosialisere, se Tikal samt gjennomfore min lille jungelfantasi; El Mirador.

Uansett, San Pedro er et skummelt sted. Ikke som i Managua der folk studerer deg noye og vurderer hva kilosprisen din er, men paa den late "San Pedro"maaten. Rommet mitt koster 2 dollar natta (med varm dusj). Maten er fantstisk utsokt og koster mellom 10 og 40 kroner for store porsjoner. Temperaturen er perfekt og utsikten nydelig. De siste dagene har jeg brukt paa aa lese boker og aa spise mat. Dette er "San Pedro"maaten, backpackere blir gjerne stuck her i maaneder av gangen. Naa har jeg heldigvis faatt med en billett vekk herfra, men kjenner allerede savnet gnage.


(Bildet: Kjekk, ung mann paa vei til San Pedro i baat)


(Bildet: "San Pedro"maaten)


(Bildet: Soramerikanere har en toff maate aa vaere "kristen" paa. F.eks. var min buss fra El Salvador tagget med "Protected by Jesus". Min egen versjon; "Jesus Christo; El camino, la verdad y la vida" (Veien, sannheten og livet))

Pacaya

AYay, I gaar var jeg og Christian U paa vulkantur her i Antigua. Det uttartet seg til crazy greier! Jeg har bilder og noen filmer, men kan ikke uploade dem her saa det tar vi senere.

Vulkanturen i seg selv var vel og bra, men nedturen var det som toppet kaka! Like for vi skulle til aa gaa ned, begynner det aa striregne. Paa dette tidspunktet befant vi oss paa varme, storknede lavasteiner. Naar regnet traff lavasteinene fordampet det umiddelbart. Dette medforte en usannsynlig tett taake. Morket var over oss og det ble med ett veldig kjolig pga. hoyden og regnet. Plutselig kunne vi hore skrik i taaken. Det viser seg nemlig at en gruppe turister har begynt aa gaa alene nedover uten aa folge guiden. Siden lavasteinene hele tide forandrer og beveger paa seg er det naturlig nok en god del sprekker og hull man kan dette ned i. Det var denne aktiviteten amerikanerne naa bedrev. Stemningen ble lett panisk, siden lavasteinene kunne vaere baade varme, veldig skarpe og uforutsigbare. Det hele endte godt da vi fant en markert sti som gikk nedover mot skogen, men opplevelsen var ganske skjellsettende i seg selv.


(Bildet: Jeg og Christian tok med oss et par litersflasker med Gallo og koste oss i noen gamle kirkeruiner, paa langfredag.)


(Bildet: Dette bildet er tatt uten zoom, for taaken forgriper seg paa oss (#2))


(Bildet: ...)

Jaja, naa skal jeg snart bevege meg fra Antigua og cruise rundt i hippiebyer langs lake Atitlan.

mmmm...

Bilder kommer senere,
hasta luego.
Anders H

Guatemala at last

Saa er jeg endelig kommet i god behold til Guatemala, Antigua. Byen er full av turister, men har sjarm nok til alle. De religiose seremoniene er sote og komiske, prisene er doblet pga. paasken og jeg har modt min gode venn Christian U. Jevnt over er jeg godt fornoyd. F.eks er maten og vinen bedre enn i Ecuador, noe jeg vet aa sette pris paa. I gaar kunne dessuten jeg og Christian sitte paa en bar med utsikt rett inn i spanske kirkeruiner, mens vi drakk hver vaar litersflaske med "Gallo" ("Hane", det lokale olet).

Men for aa komme til denne lille idyllen, maatte jeg gjennom en litt sketchy utflugt. Derfor var det i ettertid betryggende aa bli overgaatt av vaar alles kjaere Sigurd B. paa sketchyskalaen!

Sigurd says:
ang stedet du har endt opp på?

Sigurd says:
leste blogen, virker jævlig..

Anders says:
jeg er ikke der naa

Sigurd says:
kk

Anders says:
var bare paa gjennomreise

Anders says:
men det var jaevlig

Anders says:
jeg gikk ned gata for aa ta ut penger, noe jeg var plent nødt til pga. bussen

Sigurd says:
hehe, det eneste bildet du posta var av en boms og alkoholiker, og ellers at du er gretten på faren din.. gode vibber

Anders says:
og en gjeng folk sto paa siden av gata og fulgte meg med øynene

Anders says:
og plystrer etter meg

Anders says:
som om jeg var en blond skjøge ute paa tur

Anders says:
trodde jeg skulle miste pengene, passet og blomsten min

Sigurd says:
altså når jeg tenker tilbake på berlin så kan jeg si you and me both..

Sigurd says:
ble vekket på et toalettgulv i en av båsene, i en liten pøl av kloakkvann, med et el annet dritt på ansiktet. klokken var tolv om dagen, og vaskedama er i godt humør for at jeg er i live i det hele tatt.

Sigurd says:
husker ingenting fra de siste 6 timene..

Sigurd says:
husker bare at jeg hade snakket med en veldig veldig transe, og at en del homser hadde befølt meg pådansegulvet, og at jeg plutselig ble vilt sløv....

Sigurd says:
prikken over ien var at mens jeg gikk ut av den snuskete teknoklubben, mildt sagt bettuttet over hele situasjonen, med en klissvåt tskjorte og ukjent substans på siden av ansiktet, så komer det faen med enda en homse og skal prøve å sjekke meg opp.

Sigurd says:
jeg sier så klart plent nei, men klarer ikke å virke helt alvorlig, så angstfylt og mildt sagt jævlig som jeg føler meg

Sigurd says:
fyren følger etter meg og hopper faen meg inn i taxien min også... po

Sigurd says:
enget er jeg kan ikke tysk og taxisjåføren kan ikke engelsk, så mens jeg prøver å formidle at homsa i baksetet ikke er med i følget mitt, sier homsemannen det motsatte på tysk.... jeg har på følelsenm noe i dur av "han leker hard to get"

Sigurd says:
så der sitter jeg, på hjem fra berlins skitneste nattklubb, med vill angst for hva som har skjedd på den doen, og så fortsetter for pokker homsa fra baksetet å beføle meg på den kloakkvanngjennomtrukne tskjorta mi. jeg trekker meg så klart lengst mulig bort fra ham, som et brent barn.

Sigurd says:
til sist skal han heldigvis av - så klart etter et siste forsøk etter å dra meg med seg.

Sigurd says:
må innrømme at jeg har blitt litt homofob - har hvertfall fått en klar frykt for homser - etter berlinturen

Er det en ting som er digg her i livet, saa er det en god Sigurdhistorie!


(Bildet: Du ser det ikke paa bildet, men dette er Lillehammer Kubb Klubbs bidrad paa britisk pub i Quito. Selv om quizen dreide seg mye om England, gjorde faktisk LKK det relativt skarpt!)


(Bildet: Christian U, med nisseskjegg for aa skremme ukjente menn i natten.)


(Bildet: Med skjegget som beskyttelse, var det ingenting som hindret Christian i aa posere paa en utfordrende maate ved en kjonnsforvirret fontene.)

Hasta Patatas,
Anders H

Fucka i Managua

UPDATE: for your pleasure

Aya, da har flyet fraktet meg noenlunde problemfritt til Nicaragua (Managua), og jeg er stokk i en kjip hybrid mellom krigssone og drabantby. Er litt bitter paa min far som med viten og vilje har sendt meg hit, men siden jeg ga han jobben med aa kjope billetten kan jeg ikke klage. Bussen videre gaar ikke for den 06 april, noe som gir meg fire dagers asyl i mitt eget, svindyre hotellrom. Som desperat nodlosning har jeg faatt meg to hjelpegutter her nede, Juan og Jose. Delvis fordi jeg ikke vet en dritt om byen, men ogsaa fordi Juan har blitt banket invalid med manchete paa aapen gate (ifolge hans venn). De stygge arrene og det faktum at han ikke kan bevegevenstre arm eller bein noe saerlig vekket sympati i meg. Dessuten kommer jeg til aa trenge selskap hvis jeg skal overleve disse fire dagene.



(Bildet: Siden jeg ikke var videre motivert for to netter i Managua, satt jeg oppe og speidet mot busstasjonen fra dora. Like utenfor laa en uteligger sovnde med en liten kattunge tett inntil seg. Etter en stund ble jeg en smule rort. Uten aa tenke over at jeg hadde blitz paa tok jeg dette bildet. Det ble med et da lasaronen vaaknet av lysglimtet...)

Klynk,
Anders H